Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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