I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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