butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
