Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize