do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
