what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Randomize
