I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
