I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Randomize
