I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Randomize
