Farmville is her only friend.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize