Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
i need to put some appletini on your dick
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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