Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize
