well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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