She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Randomize
