so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
