Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
