I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
