Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize
