Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize
