why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
