I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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