Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
