I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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