What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
