WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
