So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
