We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
