SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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