No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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