how do flat chested girls get laid?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize