please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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