My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
