So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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