we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
