It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
