would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
