After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
