I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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