This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
