yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
