I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
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