he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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