Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
BRING THE BAGELS
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Randomize