remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
