I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize
