What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
