i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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