This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize