i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
