party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize