Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Every concussion has its silver lining
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
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